A Healing Session
Do you have someone you can cry with? Heal with? Then do.
And after a while of practice crying, cry some more. Then cry more.
Two years later you’ll get to some weeping and wailing. And then start
throwing in the “Fuck You” sessions. Hundreds of em. Then wail and howl
as your head spins around like Beetlejuice. Beetlejuice. Beetlejuice. Now
things start moving. So you think!
And you take the form of a vulture as your nose and eyes and lips
have shame and grief and guilt and spit dripping from them. Keep
sobbing, weeping, tearing, sorrowing, sniffling and snorting like a stuck
pig or a wild African Boar. Then cry again. And again. Don’t hurt yourself,
but cry till your therapist can’t see out of her glasses cuz the boogers
are flying all over the place. Your snot is dripping from the ceiling light cuz
your heart is fucking splattered across the room. She can’t see now and
only hears wailing and howling and barking like a dead frog is in your
throat. No, a dead cat. Wailing. Now there’s a dead cat wailing in the
room. And it’s you.
Yeah, then your shattering heart vibrates and pounds in your chest and
every orifice of your body has fluids coming out cuz the pain has been
festering inside you for so long. Festering. The fluids run out your eyes,
ears, nose and ass cuz they really want to. They just want OUT. And then
a river of tears starts coming under the doorway of the office
and the people outside call the police cuz there are noises like death
and all five of your eyes are weeping and now you really start cussing
with “fuck you’s” all around. Your therapist is behind
the couch by now as the room starts spinning with the energy of a shattering heart and soul.
It’s yours. No way out. And the police came because the chimney
covered in off the roof and then you cry some more for about six years
and seven months. Then it’s the real tears that start coming out. And you
weep and cry and cry and weep. And after you pick yourself off the
floor you cry from here to eternity. And longer, Cuz eternity has nothin’ to
do with time. Eternity is always and only NOW and that’s what it feels like.
Two years after the six years and seven months of crying, you get up off
the floor. Then…………..YOU BEGIN.